What Worked

I took the time to sit and meditate for 20 minutes this morning.  What came to me in meditation was a reminder of what worked for me in the past.  The other day I wrote that post titled “Healing” and mentioned how in 2008 I was more intuitive then I am now.  I wasn’t really asking why that was.  At some level I know and just haven’t said it out loud.  What came to me in meditation inspired me to put the answer out here.

When I first started down this path I did two very important things.  I read The Law of Attraction: The Teachings of Abraham by Jerry and Esther Hicks and I took a meditation course.  It was around that time that I was manifesting a level of success and peace I’d never seen before in my life.  In that time I decided to write a novel after 12 years of not writing at all.  I’m sure the idea sounded crazy to everyone around me.  Most people didn’t even know I could write.  But I set the intention with absolutely no plans of failing.  I also just wanted to create a better me and a more joyful life.

I started meditating 2 times a day for 20 minutes at each sitting.  The girls were very young at that time.  Looking back on it I don’t see how I even thought it was possible, but I did and it became possible.  I was disciplined and it worked.  It changed me forever.  I also started visualizing my day on paper every morning and reading a daily devotional.  I would write out the way my day would look, filling the page with affirmations about peace, love, and joy.

When the idea for my first novel came to me I made a writing schedule.  I’d write three pages of my novel every evening NO MATTER WHAT.  I took my lap top and wrote when we were on vacation.  I wrote when a friend came to visit from out of town.  I stayed up late and wrote if necessary, but I always finished those three pages and often wrote more.  Before each writing session I’d write my intentions and affirmations about what would be achieved in the session then I’d say a prayer.

I finished that book in 3 and a half months.  It ended up being 100,000 words which is almost twice as long as the second novel that I spent over a year writing.  That first one is raw and amateurish, but it is also intense and powerful. I was truly tuned into God when I wrote that book.  Often times I’d go back and read in disbelief that the words had come from me.

I continued some of those practices long after the book was finished.  It was at least 2 years before I missed a meditation session and I planned my day on paper for about a year.

At some point though, I got overconfident or lazy.  I thought I’d reached a point where I didn’t need to “plan” my day or meditate as often.  I allowed myself to get busy or slack.  So I made those quantum leaps of progress a few years ago and am no where near where I thought I’d be by 2011.  Without a doubt I took 3 steps forward and 2 steps back.  I can never go back completely, but right now I’m close enough.

So I’m examining what worked for me before and I am setting the intention to embrace something that works for me again.  I do so want to be an instrument for the Divine and not a slave to my Ego.  To take an idea from Wayne Dyer…I’ve had enough of this Edging God Out.


5 thoughts on “What Worked

  1. Rob December 22, 2010 / 5:44 pm

    Yep. You gotta watch the ego – it will ALWAYS try to tell you that you don’t need to meditate. Which makes perfect sense, as it knows that it will eventually perish if you persist with your spiritual practices. Glad you came to that understanding – I had thought of saying something to you before but that never works – unsolicited advice, particularly with spiritual matters, almost always fall on deaf ears. The ego tells us we are wasting our time meditating, practicing the presence, reading spiritual books, etc., but it’s like the practice of archery – if you don’t pull the arrow BACK first, in the OPPOSITE direction of the target, it will not have the energy to go forward. In a similar way, if you don’t take the time to draw back into your Higher Self, your outer life won’t show the progress you would like (both spiritually AND materially).

    But the truth is that everyone is doing the best they can at this moment, and even though they know without a doubt that if they spent twice as much time on spiritual practices they would make a LOT more progress, they just can’t bring themselves to do that until some growth occurs and the spiritual life becomes more important to them than just about anything else. Jesus’s comment about being willing to leave family and friends is indicative of this. I personally am not at that point, but I have managed through some simple strategies to replace much of my previously ‘wasted’ time with spiritual activities of one kind or another. And I am glad to say that the payoff has been huge, I now get truly excited when I think about what I am about to experience spiritually that coming day or night. The bottom line is that it’s really quite simple – when we are dissatisfied with either our ‘external’ or ‘internal’ life – we simply need to be willing to accept that we get out of it exactly what we put into it (which can be in the ‘now’ or in some previous incarnation), and that each of us is 100% responsible for our own lives.

    • lesleehorner December 22, 2010 / 11:04 pm

      Thanks for this comment Rob! No matter where you go searching and what you get into it always comes back to the answer being found in silence. I think I’ve circled back to that place for now…

    • meeshelleneal February 10, 2011 / 8:32 pm

      Rob said this better than I ever could have.

      Thank you for reminding me by writing about your own epiphany.

  2. Yola December 23, 2010 / 10:54 am

    Note to self ¨Meditate for 20 minutes, twice a day¨
    This works wonders for me as well, and I have managed to simply let it slip from my daily activities. What a sly little fox the ego is!
    Thank you for this post : )

  3. Rob December 24, 2010 / 12:34 pm

    You know, that really is a good idea – to write a note, I mean. I often put up one of those ‘sticky note’ things where I’ll see it to remind me to meditate or do some other type of spiritual activity such as breathing techniques I can do while driving (safely). Once ‘it’ becomes a habit after 2 or 3 weeks the note isn’t needed any more, by then I usually have something else I’m trying to remember so up goes a new note! :~)

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