There is a theme pushing it’s way to the surface in my life. I get the feeling that 2011 is going to be the year of healing for me. I am currently at a spiritual and physical plateau. I’ve been sort of stuck in one spot feeling as if nothing is moving. But in the Reality behind this reality a lot is going on.
In general, I am healthy. I eat well, exercise, meditate, and feed myself spiritually. With all of this in mind I ask myself and God often why I haven’t seen any huge results. Why am I still carrying around this extra 15 pounds when I gave up meat and eased up on junk food years ago? Why haven’t I made any headway on getting a novel published, which was an intention I set so long ago? Why does it seem I was more intuitive in 2008 than I have been in 2010? Why did I make huge quantum leaps in the beginning of my journey only to stall out three years into my trek?
The reason I think is that I’m just not ready yet. Obviously there is stuff within me that needs to be healed. I don’t really know what’s there. I don’t even know if it’s stuff from this life or some past one. I often joke about my bad memory, but seriously I remember so little from my younger years.
This year I plan to do the A Course In Miracles workbook. It is a year-long daily commitment. I also want to get started on Marrianne’s 21 spiritual lessons that I mentioned in yesterday’s post. Today I had brunch with a friend, Rev. Julie Keene, and she shared two books with me, both revolving around healing techniques. This stuff is not coming into my awareness for no reason. There is obviously some healing to be done.
I wonder if I’ve been sitting on this plateau, gathering the strength and desire to dive into the transformative waters of Spirit.