Incomplete Thoughts

I have three different blog posts floating through my head today.  I can’t seem to completely pull any of them together for a 500-1000 word post so I thought I’d just say a little about each.

The first thought is about privacy.  Facebook is such a freaky thing.  I’ll admit there was a time when I was really into celebrity blogs.  I visited Perez Hilton and Celebrity Baby Blog numerous times during the day.  Since I joined Facebook I rarely visit those sites.   Reading about people I know, knew, or hope to know seems to scratch that itch for me.  This week I’ve noticed a couple of cryptic status updates from folks.  They give away just enough information to make you go WAIT, WHAT?  They stir up a reaction.  Visiting the individual’s pages you see a line of people asking how they are and what’s going on.  I find myself wondering if it is better or worse that we have this public spotlight for our private matters.  On one hand you get lots of support, but is it real support?

Another issue on my mind is parent/child relationships.  In the novel I am currently writing the main character is 15 and very close with her father.  She talks to him and he listens, they respect each other, and sometimes they even act as if they are friends.    When I look around me at my husband, my friends, and the men in my church these are the kinds of fathers I see, ones who are generally interested in relating to their children.  But in response to my writing someone called the relationship weird.  So I’m wondering if I am just delusional.   Have we moved away from the “kids are to be seen and not heard” idea or not?  Is it possible for a girl to be friends with her dad or do I have some re-writing to do?

The last thought is how I’ve been a bit swallowed up.  I finally started writing this novel and it is all I can think about.  It sits in the back of my mind no matter what I am doing.  The Ray’s and White’s are demanding my attention.  I have a lot of mixed feelings on this.  On one hand it is fabulous because after a year of only writing blog posts and essays I am writing fiction again.  But it is also distracting me and I find myself losing track of my schedule, forgetting things, and neglecting healthy habits because my mind is elsewhere.  My vision of this project is exciting though.  I wonder if I can see it through.  Once it is complete I wonder what will become of it.  At writing group last night I was reminded of the work still left to do and the writing time I need but don’t have.  I have to admit, it’s frustrating and scary to think I may be traveling a path leading to a dead end, just one more book collecting cyber-dust on a shelf in my hard drive.

So that’s what’s on my mind today.  Just a few incomplete thoughts….

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11 thoughts on “Incomplete Thoughts

  1. Veronica July 30, 2010 / 6:34 am

    I think it’s totally possible! My parents divorced when I was 13, and about 2 years after that… right around 15 I went from living with my mom to living with my dad.

    We had that kind of relationship. He was still my dad, and if I was acting out, and being obnoxious he’d let me know. Every Friday we had a date night together, dinner and a movie.

    I could then, and still can to this day talk to him about anything, and he listened. He’s actually the one that fueled my love for getting into webdesign/blogging. Always supporting my decisions, and never telling me that what I wanted out of life was wrong or incomplete.

    I think you should keep going where you are going, those kind of relationships between father and a daughter are possible.

    • lesleehorner July 30, 2010 / 7:54 am

      Ooooo, Veronica, thank you so much for this comment b/c you have just helped me figure out a piece of the puzzle. Her parents will be divorcing in this novel and I hadn’t really thought carefully the “why” when it comes to who she lives with.

  2. Renee July 30, 2010 / 7:35 am

    My mother was very close to her father and I think she would say he was her friend. I haven’t seen your new novel, but I don’t think that’s necessarily weird. I guess if there’s some kind of sexual tension or something, I might be a little grossed out, but otherwise, I think it’s nice!

    As for Facebook, I HATE those vague status updates. I think it’s a passive aggressive cry for attention. If I don’t want something out on Facebook, I don’t put it out there, even vaguely. And if something I say confuses someone and they ask about it, I answer the question.

    • lesleehorner July 30, 2010 / 8:06 am

      I think the big issue with it is that it comes across at times that they are a team against the mom character. I just have to do some more work on it and make sure that what I’m trying to show is obvious.

  3. exframebuilder July 30, 2010 / 8:10 am

    When I write something, a blog post or even a novel; I ask myself, “Am I a better person for having writen this?”
    If the answer is yes, my writing it has been worthwhile. If one individual says they have become a better person for having read whatever I wrote, that is the M&Ms in my trail-mix

    • lesleehorner July 30, 2010 / 8:21 am

      Thanks for this comment…it definitely puts in perspective the other two novels I have collecting cyber-dust. Although neither of them are published and probably never will be, people have read them and expressed that sentiment (particularly with one of them). I have to admit I’ve hit the “to give up or go on” wall with this one, but in a somewhat fantastical way it touches on a VERY important period in history that I think young people need to be reminded of (it’s a YA novel). So I will be better for having written it and hopefully people will be better for having read it.

  4. Toby July 30, 2010 / 8:23 am

    LESLEE…follow that creative flow! Let yourself become immersed and taken over at times. Our creativity can be ebbing and flowing. We need to go with it when it is raging within us, and we must nurture it gently in its times of hiding and devoid. Just like a temptous relationship. Run with your creativity when it rages. Follow your instinct with that because before you know it the rage may be a mere flicker of light that you repeatedly try to ignite. At least that is how it is for me. Write like mad, girl!

  5. Jenny Defx July 30, 2010 / 8:34 am

    Remember what @OpinionatedGift said…BALANCE. And about father/daughter relationships, all I know is my own father was kind, respectful and loving and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Take people’s “comments” and “critisisms” for what they are. If you wanted to write this story to please EVERYONE, you’ll never finish. Stay true to YOU.

  6. Alisha July 30, 2010 / 3:29 pm

    I wouldn’t worry so much about people’s criticisms about the story or relationship. If you’re developing it organically, I think that’s great.

    I totally am where you are with the absentmind thing. I have so much going on in my head that I findmyself just going through the motios, letting my days run me instead of the other way around. I gotta figure out how to restore a little more balance.

  7. Lisa @ Practically Intuitive August 3, 2010 / 11:07 am

    Hi Leslee,

    A couple things about your post:

    1. I have a relative who does that “cryptic facebook” thing and it drives me INSANE. Renee mentioned in the comments above that it’s sort of a cry for attention and I totally agree. Really, just come out and say it or say nothing. But tyhat whole “whoa is me, something is going on but I won’t say what” stuff is just ridiculous. Say it or don’t.

    2. Speaking as a Daddy’s girl from the get-go, I was wonderful friends with my dad. (He died when I was 15 and it was, above all else, that friendship and “kindred spirit” sort of relationship we had that I missed the most.) I don’t see why someone comments that the relationship in your book seems “weird”. Go with what feels right to you and it will resonate with others. *Trust* what comes from inside you.

    • lesleehorner August 3, 2010 / 1:16 pm

      Thanks for your comment Lisa. The funny thing is yesterday I wrote one of those cryptic status updates b/c something was on my mind and I wanted to talk about it but couldn’t actually talk about it. I went back and deleted the status b/c I totally caught myself being one of those facebookers.

      And with the book, thanks for your input. I’ve found a bit of a compromise by taking out a few of the scenes where I’d just hit that “daughter and dad are close” nail on the head too much. I think that will resolve any questions readers will have. I was just trying too hard to get my point across and it backfired with at least one reader. And most importantly I sat down and wrote a few new pages last night…so the show goes on.

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