I have been thinking about this post for five days.  I haven’t sat down to write it because for me it was a huge click, one I’m not sure I can put into words or really explain.  I’m sitting here now, my hands on the keys, sort of hoping it will write itself.

Through the internet I’ve met some great people.  They are people I’d never come face to face with or have the opportunity to get to know otherwise.  One of those people I’ve mentioned before and you met last week through his click story.  I knew the first time I read Opinionated Gift’s blog that he was going to be one of my teachers.  I did not, however, think it would be through his fascination with a TV program.  So I’d like to dedicate this post to him and thank him for my most recent spiritual click that came b/c I watched the first season of his favorite show.

As you know one of the great spiritual teachers that I study, read and feel guided by is Joel S. Goldsmith.  I’ve been reading his books for over a year now and in nearly everyone of them he talks about Reality.  He says that the only thing that is REAL is God.  And God is not some outside force looking down upon us and intervening in our lives on occasion to either punish or reward us.  He tells us God is the moving force in everything, that the very core of our being is God.  We are an extension of God.  We are God in expression.  That is what is real about us.  When our bodies die, that part of our being lives on.  Our very essence is God and God is eternal.

As he delves further into this idea he says that everything else is more or less hypnotism.  It’s real to us only because we believe in it.  We are programed to believe that we are people with bodies and brains and problems to solve.  We have created this illusory life with people who love us and hate us, help us or make our lives more complicated.  But if a bomb dropped on our heads tomorrow all of that would be gone.  But would we be gone?  Some people say yes, if a bomb drops on my head life stops…the end.  But Joel (and me) say no!  In that moment the veil is lifted and we are infinitely aware of the hypnotism we have been released from.  In that moment we see and become the Reality which is Spirit.  It is the very definition of Omnipresent and Omnipotent.

So I’ve been reading this and intellectually buying it for over a year now.  Yet, I had no way of illustrating why I believe it or why it makes sense to me.  That is until I started watching OG’s favorite show, Dollhouse.  In this show there is a large corporations that offers people the opportunity to make lots of money and escape from the pasts that are haunting them.  They sign a contract and the company erases their memories and life.  Once they have signed themselves over and become “actives” they are rented by ultra-wealthy clients to play roles in their lives.  In some instances it is prostitution, in others it is something completely different.  But the clients “order” their perfect “Doll” and the scientist in charge fills the order and programs the person with a whole new identity.  When the “actives” wake up they really believe they are this new person.  In between gigs they are wiped clean and walk around like pleasant zombies not really feeling or expressing anything.

In a lot of ways this is how we are in our lives.  We define who we are by what we tell ourselves and what loved ones and society tells us.  We believe we are stuck in these roles and this is what life is.  The catch is we can change our lives and the fastest way to do that is to connect with what is REAL.  We don’t have to die to understand our eternal nature.  If we are quiet and attentive enough we can hear the small voice and acknowledge the intuitive tugs.  If we stop being so busy and take the time to listen we can be “in this world but not of it.”

Again, Dollhouse has done an excellent job of illustrating another point.  Echo is the main character and is, of course, an “active.”  The difference with Echo is that the hypnotism hasn’t fully worked on her.  The part of her that is REAL sends her flashes of memories and insights.  She uses this information for good in her roles.  She evolves in a way that none of the other “actives” evolve.  She is connected and in touch with her essence.  I haven’t watched the whole series but it seems that she has a big destiny and a crucial role.  Her intuition, soul, or spirit within is leading her down the right path and she is following without truly knowing why.

Our lives on this earth are programs.  I think a lot of it comes with us before we are born.  I like to believe that we are given the opportunity to create the program before we enter.  Once we are born the programming comes from a lot of different places.  Our families, schools, media, laws, history, friends, and governments add to our programming.  None of it is set in stone though.  If we seek the inner voice and quiet the outer voices we may find a destiny that we couldn’t quite imagine.  If we are brave enough to put the programming aside and follow the guidance, even without definitive answers, we may create a better or more positive life experience.

*I haven’t seen season 2 of Dollhouse.  I let another Dollhouse fan and friend read this and although he didn’t give me any clues as to what happens to Echo in season 2, it is possible I am completely wrong about her.  So if you’re reading this and you know that, please no spoilers.  In either case, my interpretation of Echo helped me better understand Joel’s teachings.


12 thoughts on “Dolls

  1. ray June 2, 2010 / 9:54 am

    ‘Looks to me like you’ve done a wonderful job of settling your mind to determine what to write. I’m glad you’ve chosen to continue to blog. You plant seeds in people’s minds and are a blessing to many.

  2. rageomatic June 2, 2010 / 2:59 pm

    Leslee, you presented your view here well, and you belief both brings you joy and harms no one, it’s a good one.

    But, I personally found the idea that true reality transcends the day to day reality I see around me a prescription for madness. By focusing on the transcendent reality instead of plain vanilla reality, I divorced myself from my very self. I learned to hate myself for mundane ways, and hate myself for my inability to see the “real” spiritual world that existed around me.

    However, humanity being an adaptable animal, what I wanted enough I got: light mental illness. The gold standard of mental health is the level of communication with reality. I increasingly removed myself from objective reality until it almost cost me my life.

    I’m not saying you are wrong, all things in moderation, transcendence is good. It helps us raise above temporary circumstances, but taken too far it robs us of the thousands of sparkling points of life that make up the gem of life.

    • lesleehorner June 2, 2010 / 4:48 pm

      I think you’re right about the madness. There is a sort of madness involved in being too deeply attached to either of the realities that exist. I can remember times I have been on the brink of madness by overly obsessing about my life dramas. (My parents could verify by telling the story about the time they wouldn’t let me go to my best friends house when I was in the 8th grade.) I also think that if I went off to live in a cave somewhere and meditate 24 hours a day I would be completely disconnected from what it means to be human. The funny thing about the show Dollhouse is that when the “actives” are erased, they seem to be a lot like people who are completely trapped in bliss. (It conjures up images of happy, detached monks or something.)

      This is where balance comes in. The catch phrases we know like “the road less traveled”, “the razor’s edge”, and “in the world but not of it” all come from this idea of finding the balance between human life and spiritual life. And quite frankly too much of the spiritual life has been missed by the emphasis on the term and image of God. The spiritual life is about checking in and knowing what is right for you. It’s about working through and letting go of fear. It’s about experiencing and acknowledging the connections that exists all around us.

      Emotion is a beautiful thing, even pain is a beautiful thing at times. I love what you said about “the thousands of sparkling points of life that make up the gem of life.” The key is to experience those moments, feel them completely, scream, cry, laugh, and then let them pass. When we relive them and abuse ourselves because of them or obsess about them wishing for their return than we have lost an important balance.

      • Kiva June 2, 2010 / 8:14 pm

        I haven’t been reading long enough to know of your studies but what I’ve seen from you to date makes plenty of sense.

        My less eloquent wording would be something along the lines that I don’t believe in the traditional God because I know, through being in touch with my intuition and very spirit, that I am my own god. I’ve seen what many religions have done and how their people act and I want no part of it! 😉 I’ve adopted many practices from a handful of faiths and think that there might just be SOMETHING out there but I’m not hard-pressed to figure that part out. It’s all part of my Journey.

        Perhaps it is a form of hypnotism, being able to wash dishes while meditating, drawing the good and positive things into my life, and not realize I’ve been washing til the last dish! It’s how I found the focus and drive – and great people – that helped me start my new business.

        Compared to some of my family – both the ‘religious’ (who are blackened, empty souls disguised as Baptists) and mentally certifiable types – I’m perfectly normal. And sane – despite the fact that I could easily be a drugged up copy of them. 😉

      • lesleehorner June 2, 2010 / 8:37 pm

        From what I have learned of you, Kiva, I’d say you are one of those people who balance well the reality and the Reality. You seem to have one foot firmly placed in both. You are able to draw the good into your life because you are connected to that Source. And I LOVE what you said about being your own god. We all are, but some of us prefer to call ourselves sinners and deny or ignore that true connection.

  3. OpinionatedGift June 2, 2010 / 8:59 pm

    What is so funny to me is how Joss Whedon, a devout atheist, approaches his existential questions in ways that are so deeply spiritual somehow.

    Buffy, Angel even Firefly (which features his most deeply existential meditation, the episode titled “Objects In Space”) all look at life and purpose and the nature of being human from so many angles.

    By the way, Dollhouse isn’t really my favorite. I loved it for it’s potential which FOX undermined every step of the way…also, Eliza Dushku in various and sundry situations and clothing.

    But also the nature of what it is to be human and have feeling. I’m reading The Host by Stephenie Meyer and there are similar themes of identity and and who we choose to be.

    I can’t wait to see what your reaction is after seeing the second season.

    • lesleehorner June 2, 2010 / 9:14 pm

      Yeah, I guess I could figure it is not your favorite…there is too much other great stuff. But since I’ve met you it’s been in the forefront b/c it was what was airing at the time. So what is your favorite? And the atheist thing is an interesting fact I did not know. It seems a clean slate in that department really opens up a new world of what it means to be human.

    • Kiva June 3, 2010 / 1:27 am

      Firefly is one I’d love to get my hands on. A friend of mine told me, moons ago, the mechanic chick reminded him of me and all I’ve seen so far is the movie. 😦

      Thanks, Leslee!

  4. meeshelleneal June 3, 2010 / 7:11 pm

    I love that you wrote this because you express how I feel so well: The key is to experience those moments, feel them completely, scream, cry, laugh, and then let them pass. When we relive them and abuse ourselves because of them or obsess about them wishing for their return than we have lost an important balance.

    Dollhouse is one of my favourite (recent) series. I got lost in it and enjoyed all the questions it brought up. I have so much more to say but my mind is currently drawing a blank. Anyway, I look forward to reading more of your entries 🙂

    • lesleehorner June 6, 2010 / 7:46 pm

      Thank you for reading and replying. I love Dollhouse and can’t wait for Season 2 to make it to DVD. I hope to connect with you again!

      • meeshelleneal June 7, 2010 / 3:46 pm

        Same! I am now subscribed to your blog and have enjoyed reading/getting to ‘know’ you 🙂

        The internet is so interesting in how it connects people and blogging is such a great tool for that too.

  5. Fun Mama - Deanna June 18, 2010 / 2:20 pm

    I watched the entire series of Dollhouse, and without ruining it for you, I don’t think you’re wrong about Echo. I think there was a lot we didn’t get to see because FOX sucks and doesn’t support its own programming.

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