Today I got home from my trip to NC. I didn’t do as much as I’d planned to on the trip (sorry if I flaked on you and you’re reading), but did get to spend time with my family, my best friends, Amy’s mom and the baby boys. We arrived home this evening two hours later than planned, thanks to some terrible traffic in SC and GA. Mark just brought in the mail and something very special was in it. Every 1st Sunday of the year at Unity Eastside, we write a letter to God describing the vision that we hope to create in our life for the year. So I thought I’d share last year’s letter dated 1-4-09.
I set aside the little I and now focus on the big I. I keep my mind on you, with you, and in you. My life shows forth that which you have planned for me. I am an instrument and I am fulfilling your purpose for me. I am propelled to do that which is of service to others and is directed by you. Thank you, thank you, thank you! I am aware and awake. My life is in you.
I was a bit surprised to read the letter. I remembered it being more of a “surrendering to the plan” rather than setting goals for myself, but it was still interesting to read almost a year after writing it. I don’t think I’ve been successful at setting aside the little I (the ego) as much as I’d hoped. This year has certainly had it’s share of drama and I’ve let myself get caught up in it at times. I do think that so much of what has happened this year has been a part of the plan and I feel like I am following an inner guidance that, despite how it feels at times, has everything in control.
I plan to write a similar letter this year (despite lots of “resolutions” that I may write about tomorrow). The best thing I can do for myself is to just let go of the wheel.
A lot has happened this year. I’ve healed and made stronger some relationships, while others have experienced blows. I’ve dealt with the death of one of my oldest and dearest friends, but was able to hold her baby boys just two days ago. I started this blog and have exposed my inner thoughts, gone out on a limb, and stepped on a few toes along the way. I’ve learned both easy and hard lessons here. I’ve met some amazing writers and bloggers who inspire me daily. I’ve continued to ask questions and take notice when the answers present themselves to me. I have been incredibly human and also had beautiful moments in communion with God. I’ve reminded myself far too often to “be present” and stop thinking about the past and the future! Mostly I’ve tried to be the instrument as often as I can. If even one person received something from my words or my deeds this year than I succeeded in that!
Happy New Year everyone! Have fun tonight and be safe…