Jane’s Click

By Jane AKA Faerian, you can read her blog here.

I wrote this in response to Leslee and her loss of her precious friend Amy – Leslee asked us to reflect on the day that our lives changed and this is what came to mind… for you Amy…

the day things changed …Part one.

My husband and I were at the hospital. We had had a baby a few hours before and we sat there and looked at the carseat and the new little red faced soul in our arms.

It was time for us to go home. To start our life as a family. But we didn’t know what to do.

We needed help to get our baby into the contraption and then get the contraption in the car.

And then they let us drive home.

They let us drive her away!

I am sure they should have stopped us. Told us off for taking away a child. We had no experience. We hadn’t passed a test, got a manual even… and here we were taking her away to begin life …. No one did – I checked behind me but no one ever came after us….

The other day my life changed Part 2.

The birth of my second daughter…

That was entirely different… she was born at home and her entrance into the world was peaceful and powerful. The most empowering experience I have had. It was hard work and scary at times but I was connected to the energy of all the women before me who had been through this passage. This place that is the closest to death most of us come… I walked that path with them and came out with a beautiful baby, in my lounge, looking into the eyes of my husband, with only friends around me…

That day changed my life because i knew if i did that – I could do anything

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3 thoughts on “Jane’s Click

  1. lesleehorner November 11, 2009 / 10:49 am

    Thank you for sharing your story. I am so impressed that you had a homebirth. I tried to have a natural VBAC but ultimately ended up with a second c-section.

    One of my motherhood “clicks” was when we got Bella home and our little dog was being a little too curious. I was so afraid he was going to hurt her. In that moment I was overwhelmed by that feeling of realizing I was responsible for keeping this human being safe for the next 18 or so years.

  2. Kasey November 11, 2009 / 4:21 pm

    How beautiful. I felt the same way when we drove away from the hospital with our first born. That is fantastic that you were able to give birth at home surrounded by the peace and love of your family. Thank you for sharing your “click”…

  3. julian November 11, 2009 / 7:00 pm

    Your story is very similar to mine when my daughter was born. I was in the military at the time and had been trained thoroughly in everything. And I mean everything! I can remember one time the drill instructor had about 20 of us in the shower room and yelled out, “THIS IS HOW YOU WILL WASH YOUR NASTY BODY. PUT SHAMPOO IN YOUR HAND NOW! WASH YOUR HEAD! (five seconds later) YOUR DONE!!! PUT SOAP ON YOUR WASH CLOTH NOW! SCRUB TOP TO BOTTOM… START WITH YOUR FACE.

    You get the idea. We were given instruction on something as basic as how to take a shower but when it came to raising a child… no class, no instruction, no manual.

    We took her away about 18 hours after my wife had given birth. No one said, remember to do xxxxx; or she eats about this often or this much. If she cries it could be this. I was terrified as we drove away from the hospital.

    Amazingly, she is still alive and doing quite well despite quite a few screw ups on my part. : )

    Nice click story Jane. Thanks for sharing.

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