As I am writing this it is Sunday evening, August 23, 2009. I just began packing my first school lunch as a mom. Sure, on occasion the girls stayed for “lunch bunch” at their preschools but this is the real deal. Bella starts kindergarten tomorrow. The journey begins. As we were sitting in the cafeteria during the pizza lunch at orientation Friday afternoon, Mark brought it to my attention that now we are starting school all over again. I didn’t much care for school as a student (or a teacher for that matter). The first day of school always terrified me. I was a quiet, day-dreamer, which added pressure for me. There was always the fear that I wouldn’t be outgoing enough to make friends or that I’d get called on in class in one of those moments when I was off in another world. I was the happiest in school when I was given an assignment I could get lost in. I recall that happening in Geometry, Art, Yearbook, and English. So now I start the whole process over again, standing on a side I’ve never stood before. I’ve been the student and the teacher, now I’m the mom. I’m not sure at this moment what my wishes are for Bella. I’m hoping that at least kindergarten will be blissful for her.
Bella, on the other hand, is relaxed right now. She is easy-going in these type situations, so we haven’t done a lot of talking and preparing. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing, but right now the only person feeling any anxiety is me. I was the one disappointed to find that none of her friends from preschool were in her class. She didn’t even ask or seem to notice. She’s open to and up for this new adventure. And I am hanging in here, doing my best not to project my fears on to her.
So tomorrow (or today as you read this) on August 24, 2009, I embark on another journey through school that will last for at least the next 15 years. Can you say YIKES?!?!?!